The Mask

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How many times in life have we hid behind a mask? Not the type we wear on Halloween, but rather an emotional mask. I know for me, I’ve admittedly done this several times throughout my life. I remember when I was married, I wore the, our marriage is good and I’m happy mask, when majority of the time I wasn’t. But, I felt as though I didn’t have a choice. He wanted things to be a certain way, so I adjusted who I was to keep peace in our home and to keep our family together. Yet, I wasn’t happy. I knew with each day that passed, I was losing who I was as a person. My smile was fading and at times I didn’t even recognize my own self. Although I was dying inside, I wore my mask. I perfected my role in public and cried at night. When I finally decided to leave that situation many people were in shock. They thought we were a happy functioning couple with a beautiful family. The idea of us divorcing blew the minds of many. But, I knew the truth. And after everything was finalized, I hesitantly looked beyond the mask I hid behind for so many years and actually looked in the mirror and saw me. I was scared at first because I didn’t know who I had become. Deep inside, I knew the real me was anxiously awaiting to come out again. When I finally took a look, I saw me. And I smiled.

In this life sometimes we have to show face in order to make it through the day. Most people have professional jobs and bringing our personal issues to work is totally unacceptable. Thus, we hide behind a smile, a suit, a beautiful dress, make up, perfume, cologne, shoes or a fancy hairstyle so we can look the part of nothing is wrong with me. All the while, we just want those eight hours to be done so that we can go home in wallow in our sorrows.

What I’ve learned in this life is that everything has a season. True, things may not be going well for you right now, but joy comes in the morning. That morning may literally be the next morning, or you may have to endure several mornings in order for it to come back. But, trust me, it will. I always tell people, don’t be ashamed if you feel angry, hurt, sad and want to cry. Never deny yourself those emotions. Experience them for what they are; simply feelings, and eventually move on and let them go. Never stay in a negative emotion or state of mind.

Yes, you may have a wear mask at some point in your life, but know that’s ok. Just don’t ever become the mask. You have to let the real you be you at some point. If you need to talk to someone, do that. If you need someone to pray with you, don’t be afraid to ask. If you need counseling, seek help. Whatever you have to do to be your true self, do it. Only you can be you. God gave you that smile for a reason. God gave you that personality for a reason.

So if you find yourself as one who wears a mask, I encouraged you to look pass the mask and see the great person you truly are. It’s amazing how many people just tell me how happy I look nowadays. This time, my happiness isn’t a mask, it’s what I truly am.

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Author: koolaidsmile78

I'm a radical follower of Jesus Christ who is a newly wed with two handsome boys, who just wants to share my thoughts and experiences with those who care to read them. You can view and subscribe to my videos on YouTube: Koolaidsmile78 or my like my Facebook page: onecandleatatime. Enjoy!

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